Hello, dear readers! I'm Chrissy Clary, ready to share the beginning of my new journey with you. This is my first letter to you from the desk of Wander 'Bout, a lifestyle blog born out of a desire to inspire creativity and exploration. If you are wondering why I quit my job and to mess around with this blog, well let me take you through my story...
My career has been a tapestry of interesting roles and experiences, from working in beauty and home services to aerospace, publishing, higher education and venture capital. It was a period of climbing, learning, and exploring. However, as time passed, I felt numb. What happened to the passionate woman who would try anything to bring her big ideas to life?!?
I lost interest in the things I was once so driven to pursue and particular personality types in the workforce were really becoming an emotional trigger. No one appreciates the critical supervisor, but I noticed - and it was brought to my attention over the years - that others handed the strain better. For me the experiences brought on flashbacks, crippling stomach pains, nightmares and panic attacks.
I once loved being on stage and conveying messages in fun and engaging ways, and when I had a big idea I would pursue it like a dog on a bone. Now I find that I stutter, my heart pounds and my hands shake when try to share a thought at the corporate table.
I thought that if I worked hard enough I could succeed at anything. But there were other factors at play, something deep and dark that I mentally boxed away a long time ago. Although I didn't realize it, the shame I tried to file away and forget would become a cancer that chipped away at my self-esteem. Along with the physical symptoms, I fell into a pattern of avoidance that worsened over the years.
The Decision to Quit
Quiet quitting crossed my mind several times, but that isn't in me. So, I ultimately took the leap and quit my job. After years of challenges, triumphs, and hard lessons, I decided I needed to take a break and figure out what exactly was happening to me and focus on healing.
With my son off to college and enough in savings to last for a year or so, I decided I should take a gap year. Probably the most terrifying decision I have ever made. I mean I have been working since I was 13, and I quit a great contract with Loreal with no plan for what I would do next.
I am still surprised by my decision. But it was clear to both Jeff and I that something real was happening to me that needed to be addressed. Jeff encouraged me to seek help through the Veterans Administration. That was hard.
The VA confirmed that I was suffering from PTSD stemming from trauma I experienced while in the Military. They are now providing treatment and helping unpack my box using a therapy called Prolonged Exposure.
It only took 20 years to find the space and courage to address what happened. I now understand how those experiences festered and derailed my attempts to obtain what I believed to be success.
So what to do now?
I learned something a few years back that now I realize was pivotal in helping me deal with the symptoms of PTSD. I took a class with Shelley Carlson, a researcher specializing in creativity, she taught me the significance of "experience" in leading a creative, happy life.
Those benefits as I understand them include:
Broadened Perspective: Experiencing new places, cultures, and situations challenges our thinking, encouraging innovative ideas.
Connections and Associations: New experiences provide rich memories and sensory inputs, fostering creative thinking.
Imagination and Insight: Life experiences fuel our imagination, allowing us to express unique perspectives and enhance creative outputs.
I appreciate and understand that having novel and new experiences, and living a life in pursuit of discovery is a pretty good way to replace old bad memories with new happy ones. In other words, If you are amazed by the things you are seeing, it is much easier to not think about the bad stuff.
Let's Go Wander 'Bout
Equipped with the knowledge that a variety of experiences truly enhances our creativity - improving our problem-solving skills and, in our opinion, leading to greater happiness - Jeff and I created Wander 'Bout.
Life can be challenging and at times it can overwhelm, but we have faith that new experiences can offer the insight necessary to recover and reconnect, and in some instances save lives. This platform allows us to share our journey with the aim of inspiring you and others to the same.
For the first time, I’m embracing the unknown, with no concrete plan in sight. Yet, for the first time in years, I am deeply engaged in work I feel passionate about—and right now, that’s all that matters.
If I have piqued your interest and you would like to join us on our adventures or share your own experiences follow @LetsgoWanderBout on social or subscribe to the blog.
We're not lost, we're exploring. Join Us!